Happiness for me starts with the simple question, Who am I?
That is a question I’ve been asking all my life. From growing up without a father and thinking I needed to accurately know the man for me to be complete. To being in awe of a mother who has more love in her heart for people than I could ever imagine was plausible for a person. My mother is my hero by the way, I don’t speak of her that much just because I don’t know what to say about a person who has so much to give but finds it overwhelming to ask.
I see my mother’s love in the little things I sometimes do. If I can be a quarter of the person she is, I would be satisfied with my life and living.
But see that’s me, I’m aware, more so than ever before. It wasn’t an easy road either, but here are a few things I did to get me more self-aware and effectively, more happy;
1. Follow others.
The internet has created a world where anything and almost everything is at our fingertips. So follow successful people who inspire you to whatever greatness you want. Last year this time I wasn’t following anyone, then father dearest sent me about 30 audios from podcasts of successful people and my life has never been the same. Who knew all these people were going through similar things and could help contextualise what I felt.
2. Challenge accepted.
Challenging myself to get up and just do has proved to be absolutely necessary in the pursuit of being self aware. So challenge yourself, set achievable tasks that stem deep from your truth and work on them. For me, it was absolutely the most mandane things I challenged myself on. If you know me, you know my love for natural hair and dreads is unbelievable but for so long I’m certain it was just a phase, so I started speaking on it more, growing my hair out and pampering the head that will hold glorious locks. As of writing this, I still don’t have dreads, still taking steps there lol. Or the challenge can be really big, like following your dreams. It’s still done in small steps with lots of optimism and courage, but it is about accepting the challenge.
This one has proved the most tricky for me, here is why. I get so caught up imagining what my plans look like in my head I often forget that life happens in the real world and not my make believe world. What does execution actually mean? For me, it means mapping my words and thoughts to my actions. This is unbelievably scary because in my world I am King. I own all the real estate and I play favourite which usually always leads to me winning, in my head. But hard truth is life isn’t accomplished simply in the mind. Try to find the balance between achieving and dreaming is crazy. Let no one lie to you about how much it will ask of you to invest just to translate what’s in your mind to people in the actual world.
My biggest mistake, because this is still a mistake I end up making, is having the dream laid right in front of me and expecting that the dream will materialize the same in the world. First thing I had to do for myself was realise my head had big ideas and complete pictures. I try to break the puzzle down till I only have two pieces, my starting piece or start point and my next piece or next point of movement. Finding the step that takes you to the next step is where the trick lies, I’ve found.
Being self aware is not easy but the process is beautiful, finding my voice and being confident in my choices because they express who I am.
Self-awareness has led to my happiness. Knowing who I am has me actively excited to step more into my truth, a place where joy overflows.