I’ll be the first to admit I don’t usually get it right or even know what needs getting right. I’m at times oblivious to the many slights of society towards females. I know how difficult it is for me to sometimes understand everything that’s going on with females or even how I can be of any help.
Judging by the number of books and articles on how to ‘understand women’ I know I’m not the only one trying to decode whats wrong and how I can help. One thing I’ve found that can be extremely useful to do, is keeping quiet and listening. I equally find this difficult, because sometimes I feel overwhelmed with how much ‘she’ has said, that I get lost in the sauce. But generally listening is extremely helpful, also because whenever I speak, thinking I understand and want to say something helpful, I end up messing it all up by my wonderful, thoughtful but also insensitive advice.
Cat calling is tricky ground in these parts, but there is a method I use before attempting the occasional cat call.
Firstly and most importantly, I ask myself, do I know her? If at any point I’m unsure then the answer is a resolute no.
Secondly, and this is where you get to be your own auditor, if I do know her do we vibe in that area of cat calling? If no, probably best to avoid it altogether. I have people close to me who we joke about these things, as is in our relationship. These are females I’m comfortable and close to, it’s our thing. Not everyone has that, so don’t do what isn’t you.
No need to make ‘her’ mad then complain about ‘her’ to your friends saying, ‘like she’s all that’ or some nonsense variation. You don’t know her like that, stop being disrespectful!
Thirdly, On the occasion where you do mess up and are insensitive, regardless if you know the female or not, stop and apologize. You lose nothing by admitting you have wronged her. After the apology I usually like to spare a few extra minutes if I have them, to find out what I did wrong and how best I can possibly avoid repeating such with another. This for me usually leads to massive unlearning, and at times we’ve even gone further to build a friendship.
‘She’ won’t bite your head off, well that depends, but both of you will leave knowing the world can be better, one human interaction at a time. These are our mothers, sisters, wives, and daughters they deserve respect and love.
Let’s create a cycle of love that will envelope the world, one human interaction at a time.