Who Am I?

I am love. I am an attempt at love at least. Love is given freely, void of expectation. You don’t need to be bothered if love is unrequited. Love is full, over flowing all the time.

Love is a meandering manifestation of the many different imaginations my mind can contain.

Anger, like the blocking beaver building dams, blocking passage ways. But truly if in love I have learnt to bathe, then maybe turning the other cheek will show me a species on the cusp of starting a new life, in a new place.

Or maybe love, like abit of jealousy. Like when I hug you, say goodnight and close the door behind me. Is anybody going to knock on the door behind me? Late night calls, have ‘you’ laughing all night kind of jealousy, even though I never be trying to call. Hold up, that ain’t even my girl, but that’s the type of jealousy. Laugh it off, remembering the whole time, that my self-love table tops, wobble too much to build anything solid. But you’re amazing, I wish you all the happiness in the world. I hope what you need knocks on the door, I’ve left behind me.

Love like a friend picking up my tossed aside happiness. Love like accepting the consequences and trying to be happy for the picked up happiness. Love like it really is, my fault. Like I’m sorry I didn’t realize my silence was a form of choosing, Like yes, that was my choice and I apologize for my lacking, lack of self.

However, knowing what I now know about my life, it would seem a thank you is much more prudent. I would never have gotten here if I had never met you. You helped shape, This!

Love like realising I messed up. Like it should be me, but it isn’t. I’ve been off discovering every mountain and mole hill. Understanding the explosion of every waterfall and figuring out that its not all water that falls that must be explosive.

Love, like all this could change and still a way must be found to be expressive of self. Love is understanding where I am, who I am, and figuring out how to live each day soaked in love, soaked in my truth!

musilm girl


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